Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Christmas Lease

I reckon it's that time of year again when we renew our annual Christmas Lease with those Robber Baron credit card companies. Seems like we just get all those dang presents paid off and here we go again.

I don't know about you but I'm gonna make my gifts this year. I've already sharpened my pocket knife to whittle some chopsticks for a couple what love Chinese food. I let Big Junior know I was needing all his leftover beer cans. I'm gonna wrap them up in a black plastic bag with an orange day-glow ribbon I borrowed from the Highway Department and give the whole affair to Harmon Hicks for his beer can collection. I hear tell he says it's gonna be worth big money some day.

And, since it's too cold to Bar-B-Q outdoors I'll be rounding up those left over charcoal briquets and painting them up like Easter Eggs for that banker of mine who didn't have sufficient funds to cover those checks I sent to the credit card folks.

And, for my live-in boss, I'm gonna get around to that Honey-Do list and finally have R.L. haul off that old broke down pick-up what's been sitting on blocks going on five years now. He called just the other day to say he'd give me cash money for it and I sure could use the $25.

And with that loot I'll get a store-bought turkey for Christmas dinner. That one I harvested last year was tough as an old boot. What we couldn't eat -- which was dang near the whole critter -- I passed along to my hound Roy. Being one of your smarter dogs Roy wasted no time in giving the bird a decent burial.

I'm still pondering other ways to get through this Christmas, not spend any loot and give folks something they just might find useful. Still in all, that family heirloom fruitcake what's been passed around for nigh on a generation makes an mighty attractive door stop.

Maybe it would be enough just to give folks a helping hand from time to time. It don't reach into your wallet and you'll be giving folks something they really need. I know for a certainty that Later Billy could use some help on that winter garden he started last year.